An Elephant, a Dog and an Ass,
Tried to see who would pee the fastest,
On the referee’s go,
All three unleashed their flow,
And learnt: Pee time is constant over mass*.
*assuming mass > 3 kg The first sentence of this paper reads: “We filmed the urination of 16 animals and obtained 28 videos of urination from YouTube, listed in SI Appendix. Movies S1–S4 show that urination style is strongly dependent on animal size.” http://www.pnas.org/content/111/33/11932.full